We know that today’s 24/7 culture places many demands on mind and body. People are under pressure to DO more, but self-care is not always a priority. We also know that some people look after themselves, and ask for interventions, gaining support through specialists such as Bridgeham clinic, quicker than others. Some will go when they have a niggle and others will wait until they are completely broken before they even think about asking for help. We all behave in different ways.

As a patient of Bridgeham Clinic, I have experienced the care and attention they give to all their clients and their belief that everyone can be ‘brilliant’,moving through their ‘Broken to Brilliant’ programmes. As a leadership coach, I have also had the pleasure of working with Bridgeham focusing on behaviour preferences and resilience, helping them to continue being brilliant and ensuring they get the best out of you, the client.

What do I mean by behaviour preferences?

Your behaviour preferences are those behaviours that dictate how you deal with situations, how you work with others, how you self-care, communicate, handle stress, give and receive feedback, cope with change and make decisions. They are reflected in how you build relationships, not only with those around you but with yourself too. You will have a set of behaviours that are instinctive and natural, you use them without thinking and there are others which you will have learnt to have dialled up to help you in certain situations.

They are called preferences because of just that, they are your preferred way of doing things and you’re very capable, with practice, to bring other behaviours to the table too.

Why is this relevant to lockdown and our wellbeing?

During lockdown, relationships have really been put to the test as understanding self and others has been magnified.

Those people who get their energy from other people, the extroverts amongst us, are trying their hardest to get this over Zoom and may well be struggling, where as those with a more introverted behaviour preference are happier with lockdown as they get some of their energy from within so they find it easier to generate this themselves.

If you’re living with friends and family at the moment and spending more time with them than you would normally, you may be noticing these differences and also the struggles that each preference type may be experiencing. By understanding these, you are able to show a little more understanding, a little more tolerance and possibly a little less frustration.

I have 2 sons, the eldest is higher on the extroversion spectrum and he has really struggled and become quite withdrawn as he misses the opportunity to connect with others. Gaming with his friends has become so important, and although monitored, we have realised his need for this. My youngest is balanced with introversion and extroversion and although he misses his friends, he is quite content making up games, playing and entertaining himself. It really has been a remarkable difference. Therefore, we have ended up parenting them quite differently, ensuring we meet their individual needs. My husband and I are also very aware of our own needs and therefore support each other in when we need time out, a walk on our own, time with the kids etc. We are by no means a perfect family, but we do have the tools to help us understand each other better.

With Wellbeing in mind, we would like to offer you an opportunity to learn more about yourself, family or friends and how lock down could be affecting wellbeing and your relationships with others. I use a tool called C-Me colour profiling, used a lot in business and C-Me have created a Friends and Family report focusing on you at home, rather than in a business context. It can be used with those aged 14+ (this is a suggested age, it is not restricted) to help you as a family or house mates reduce frustrations and help each other where they need the support. By understanding individual needs, it’s a great way to help improve relationships,therefore improving everyone’s wellbeing. 

About C-Me

C-Me is a psychometric tool focusing on behaviour preferences. Everyone behaves and reacts differently to different things. You also change your behaviour depending on your environment and the people you are with. Being aware of your behaviour preferences at any one time helps you understand the impact you have on those around you and also gives you the tools to adapt your behaviour to improve relationships. The word ‘preference’ is key because we have a preferred way of doing most things, it doesn’t mean we can’t behave in a different way, it just means we need to put more effort into it therefore building different muscle memory - something those working is osteopathy and well-being will understand well. 

Opportunity to know more

If you would like to know more about C-Me and the power of behaviour preferencing, I am running two free webinars in July:
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Wednesday 15th July 8-9pm - Knowing me, knowing you - how to flex your behaviour for TEENS - click here to book your place.

Wednesday 22nd July 8-9pm - Knowing me, knowing you - how to flex your behaviour for WELLBEING - click here to book your place.

You can also hear more about my work by listening to a recent Parent Practice podcast which I took part in called ‘‘Understanding self for future happiness and success’.

Alex Webb

Alex is an experienced coach and facilitator, working with individuals and teams to become resilient leaders,across all age ranges. Focusing on behaviour change, self-awareness, leadership development and team performance. Her belief is that self-awareness is the foundation of everything we do. If we know our behaviours and the impact they have on others, our real impact, we can start to become a better listener, abetter mum/dad/manager which naturally leads to being a better leader, wherever you are in your journey.  

Alex runs 2 companies Flying Start XP, developing leadership skills for early careers and TLRdynamics, focusing on leadership development for teams and individuals from middle managers and above.